Low Carb Crib - Carb Counter

The Pimp Is In The Crib And He Is Your Carb Counter

The Pimp is a stickler as a carb counter

That's right, he is. He being me. Not only does the Pimp refer to himself in the third person, but as a carb counter there can be no bigger hard-ass. He likes to ride his employees. Hard. All night long. About their weight that is. You see, when it comes to his line of work, it's important what the staff's physical appearance looks like. In fact it is one of the most important things, and the way he is able to keep tabs on his ladies is by counting carbs. That's right, he makes them write down exactly how many they eat in each and every meal and then he reviews their diets every day. If they eat too many carbs, he is tempted to issue a smack!

Which he doesn't, because he is a compassionate and caring escort service manager.
However this is a business, so he makes them get an expensive shiny new carb counter device and takes it out of their cut for the night. People have to learn somehow and it is for their own good.

Sometimes, bitches have to recognize

Recognize the carb counter, that is. If you do not have the discipline to count them on your own, then the Pimp has no choice but to invest in a device that you carry with you everywhere. Sure it is cumbersome to cram into that tiny, tiny purse but really you could do a lot worse. Thanks to the helpfulness of the carb counter you will continue to keep that butt slim and those curves bangin' so that the corporation will continue to rake in the money. Which is what this carb counting business is all about. Making money.